Somewhere along the line, "prepare your pelvic floor for birth" got translated as "strengthen your pelvic floor for birth" — as if delivery were a maximal effort your muscles need to power through, like a heavy deadlift.
But that's not the physiology. The engine of birth is your uterus — the strongest muscle, gram for gram, in the human body — contracting involuntarily in powerful waves you don't control and don't need to. Your pelvic floor isn't the engine. It's the door. And a door has exactly one job when something needs to come through: open.
The physiology, in one minute
During the pushing stage, your uterus contracts down on the baby while you add pressure from above with your breath and abdominal wall. Meanwhile, your baby's head descends onto the pelvic floor — and the muscles there must lengthen dramatically to let the baby rotate and pass. Estimates put the stretch of some pelvic floor muscles during crowning at multiple times their resting length. That is the single greatest lengthening demand any muscle in your body will ever face.
Now ask: what does that muscle need on the big day? The ability to produce a hard clench? Or the ability to let go completely under pressure?
A pelvic floor that's trained only to grip — years of squeeze-only kegels, "engage your core!" culture, stress-holding — meets the descending baby like a door that fights its hinges. Tension in the second stage can slow descent, exhaust you, and work against the very tissue flexibility that reduces strain. A floor that knows how to yield gets out of the way and lets the engine do its work.
Strength gets you through pregnancy. Release gets you through birth. You need both — but only one of them is usually missing.
Wait — so should I skip pelvic floor strength entirely?
No — this is a both/and, not an either/or. Through pregnancy, your pelvic floor is supporting extra weight for months, and coordination training genuinely helps (it's also your postpartum head start — the research on pelvic floor muscle training and continence is strong). The nuance is the full cycle: a functional floor lengthens fully AND recoils promptly, like a spring. Most instruction only ever teaches the recoil. Birth is the one event where the lengthening half is the entire exam. If you haven't read Beyond Kegels, that's the companion piece — the elevator drill there, especially the "ground floor" release, is the base skill for everything below.
How to train the opening
Try This — The release breath
Inhale down, jaw soft
- Settle into any supported position from the list below.
- Inhale slowly through your nose, and instead of "doing" anything, allow — feel your pelvic floor descend and widen with the breath, the elevator sinking to the ground floor. Imagine the space between your sit bones broadening.
- Exhale without gripping — let the floor rebound on its own, no lift added.
- Soften your jaw and lips as you breathe. It sounds like midwife folklore, but the jaw–pelvic floor connection is real in practice: a clenched jaw and a released pelvic floor rarely coexist. Loose lips, loose hips.
- Continue for 8–10 breaths per position, letting each exhale be a little quieter than the last.
If you feel pressure bulging downward or any pain, make the breath smaller and check your position support. Release is passive — if you're "pushing" the floor down, that's bearing down, and it's not this practice.
5 supported positions to practice the release
Each one biases the pelvis open and makes the release easier to find. Props are non-negotiable: support is what convinces a guarding muscle it's safe to let go. (For the hip-mobility side of the same preparation, see Prepare Your Hips for Birth.)
1
Supported Yogi Squat
Opens the lower pelvis · gravity assists the release
Feet wide, toes out, hips resting on a block or bolster. Elbows rest lightly inside the knees. Let your weight pour down into the support and breathe the floor open. This is also a classic laboring position — practicing it now is rehearsal.
Props: block/bolster under hips, rolled blanket under heels.
2
Puppy Pose, Feet Apart
Lengthens the back line · tips the pelvis into openness
Kneel with knees and feet wide, walk your hands forward and melt your chest toward the floor (forehead on a cushion), hips staying high over knees. The wide-kneed, hips-up shape unloads the pelvic floor beautifully — many women feel the release here most easily of all.
Props: cushion under forehead, blanket under knees.
3
Supported Lizard
Deep asymmetric opening · inner-line release
One foot forward and wide, back knee down, forearms or hands on blocks. The asymmetry mirrors how babies actually navigate the pelvis — one side at a time. Breathe into the side of the pelvis that's open.
Props: blocks, cushion under back knee. Both sides.
4
Supported Fire Log
Outer hip release · frees the guarding muscles
Shins stacked (or easy cross-legged), seated on a cushion, gentle forward hinge. The deep outer-hip muscles share fascial real estate with the pelvic floor — when they release, the floor follows more willingly.
Props: cushion under hips, blocks under knees. Both sides.
5
Supported Reclined Butterfly
Total surrender · nervous system downshift
Reclined on a bolster (propped, not flat), soles together, knees wide onto cushions. The finishing pose: nothing to hold, gravity doing the opening, breath slowing everything down. The state you find here — soft jaw, slow exhale, unguarded floor — is the state that serves labor.
Props: bolster behind spine, cushions under knees.
The nervous system is half the practice
Your pelvic floor is exquisitely responsive to your stress state — fear and adrenaline tighten it reflexively (the same physiology that makes labor slow down in stressful environments). Every minute you spend in these positions breathing slowly is training the release and training the calm that permits it. They're not two practices. That's why this work doubles as the best sleep-prep in your third trimester.
Safety & scope
I'm a fitness specialist, not a midwife or physical therapist. This is education and general practice, not birth instructions — your pushing strategy on the day belongs to you and your birth team. Clear these positions with your provider (especially with complications like previa or cerclage), skip anything painful, and if you have significant pelvic pain or prolapse symptoms, a pelvic floor PT should personalize this work.
FAQ
When should I start release practice?
Gentle release breathing is appropriate throughout pregnancy, but the dedicated practice earns its keep from around 28–30 weeks — the same window as the hip work. Daily 10-minute sessions in the final 8 weeks is the dose I teach.
Should I stop kegels in the third trimester?
Blanket rules miss the point — it depends on your floor. Many women benefit from shifting the emphasis from lift-dominant to release-dominant late in pregnancy, while keeping the coordination. If you have symptoms in either direction (leaking vs. tension/pain), a pelvic floor PT can tell you which side of the seesaw needs weight.
Does this replace perineal massage?
No — they're complementary. Perineal massage (from ~34–35 weeks, per your provider's guidance) works on local tissue extensibility; this practice works on the muscular and nervous-system release above it. Many birth teams recommend both.
Will this guarantee I don't tear?
Nothing can promise that — presentation, speed of delivery, and factors outside anyone's control matter. What release training, positioning, and breath work offer is a stack of real, modifiable advantages. Prepare thoroughly; hold outcomes loosely.
What about breathing during actual pushing?
Breath strategy for the second stage — including why purple-faced breath-holding isn't the only option — is its own topic, and it's taught in full inside the Birth Ready Anatomy & Technique course.
Train the open, not just the squeeze.
Birth Ready teaches the full system — breath, release, hips, and strength — trimester by trimester through week 40. First week free.
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Em is a prenatal and postpartum fitness specialist and the founder of motherbuilt. She teaches technique-first programs covering pregnancy (weeks 1–40) and the postpartum rebuild. Find her on Instagram at @birthreadymama.